you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
