Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
and eventually we just all took our pants off
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
