I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
