I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
NoShamevember. You game?
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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