you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
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