she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
