you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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