Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
