sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
