I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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