I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
