In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I touched a dick in church today
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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