the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
