ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
