i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
