i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
