Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Randomize