rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
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