I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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