Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
