DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize