hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
