This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I just blew my weed a kiss
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
