ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Randomize
