She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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