Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
