i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
