ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Randomize
