We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
