Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
