How'd it feel making her break her religion?
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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