i don't like sucking hair
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Randomize
