tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
