would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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