Do you still have your period?
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
