She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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