you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
