I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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