The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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