The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
True strength comes from lack of pants
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
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