whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
