you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
The power of my boobs compel you
Randomize
