Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
