Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
