Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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