She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Randomize
