btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
