you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
