well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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