how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
